what a vsco hoe

My penis was in the Guinness Book Of World Records






...then the librarian told me I had to take it out because she called the police.

I'm just sayin you could do better

one time tessa threw a party and i told her i would need ice, so she froze me a bowl of water that i had to just chip away at through the night lmao

Netflix is incomplete without the Harry Potter movies

girls will RT stuff like “don’t update me on people from my past. that has nothing to do with me😌✨💅” and then get all their friends to follow your instagram LMAO

I think you'd be good to me, and I'd be so good to you

once u get ur license it becomes less of a winter wonderland and more of a slippery white death trap

Cocktails are such a long way to get drunk I’m sorry let’s just take shots and stop wasting time I’m not that thirsty

being in a relationship is just reading two horoscopes instead of one

if you work in retail long enough you should be given license to kill

Love is Blind is so stupid I can’t stop watching it