I assume “Avatar” and “The Smurfs” take place in the same cinematic universe.

Even my imaginary friend leaves voicemail.

I'm kind of a medium deal around here

Take time from burning it all down to be thankful for the ability to burn it all down.

According to recent studies, many people are virgins prior to having sex for the first time.

People are starving for justice.

Horror movie idea:

Getting dragged to a craft fair

Dark mode, but for your personality

If someone sends one of yours a dick pic, you send one of theirs a pic of an even bigger dick. That's the Chicago way.

Jared Kushner and Stephen Miller should die in prison.

Now, who wants ice cream?

Have not been following the news too closely, but apparently Ben Shapiro wants people to describe dicks to him?

It takes two to be creeped out.

One to be creepy as fuck, and another to spray them with pepper spray.